We have bought into a cultural idea that this type of person is worth more than that one. We pay more attention, give more affection, and spend more time with people we think are more important. It’s not that we can’t have friends. Of course we can! But when we show favoritism based on things like the color of someone’s skin, the balance in their bank account, or the side of the tracks they’re from, there’s something wrong. When we show favoritism, James warns us, we degrade the value of the other person’s soul.

Favoritism and discrimination are inconsistent with our faith. That’s the bottom line. This Sunday we talked about and applied that to how we serve, when we serve, and who we serve. But it goes deeper than that. The fingers of favoritism can reach into our day-to-day lives as well.

And one place that happens, sometimes without us even realizing it, is with our family.

Do you play favorites? Do you prefer one kid over another? Do you show partiality to your son but hardly pay attention to your daughter? Don’t answer too quickly.

I’ve been reading up on favoritism and partiality while preparing for this message. One thing that I never really thought about when it comes to this passage, but really kicked my tail, was how our kids respond when they even think that there’s a favorite in the house – and it’s not them.

Kids who feel like their parents prefer their sibling over them tend to behave worse, get in trouble more, start drinking at an earlier age, smoke cigarettes, try marijuana, and even more into harder drugs. It’s true! It’s hard to comprehend how such a minor thing like picking favorites can be so detrimental, but is it worth risking?

Maybe you don’t think you’re picking favorites. But really think about it. Do you rarely show up for your youngest’s swim meets when you all piled into the car for every one of your oldest’s ball games? Do you spend more time with one child over another? Are you unconsciously telling them that you love one more than the other?

One thing to keep in mind is the words you use. Avoid saying things like, “I wish you would act more like your sister,” “We never had this problem with your brother,” or “I don’t think you should do that, because your sister never did.”

Your kids will be picking up the cues. So you need to be aware of them too. Here’s what Gregory Jantz, a research psychologist, says about it. “Children are not stupid. They can sense when this type of inequity exists. They can sense it even when the parent does not. Desperately they attempt to figure out what is wrong with them. The reasons they come up with can cause lifelong damage to self-esteem.”

But there is good news. Because when your family is close-knit, full of unconditional love, looking out for each other, no matter what mistakes you make when it comes to playing favorites, your kids pick up on the good things over the bad. The key is to have a good relationship with your kids, asking them for forgiveness when you mess up, and not coming down too hard on them when they do the same.

Some words get a bad rap. I think “religion” is one of them. Over the last ten years or more, we’ve swung the pendulum away from that word to other words, like “spiritual” or “relationship.” My faith in God is based on a relationship with Jesus, that’s a fact. But I don’t think we need to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Religion can still be a positive word in the church.

Let me give you a quick and simple definition. Religion is the observable qualities of our faith. It’s about putting what we believe into action. Most of the time we do that in a church service, by praying or singing or bowing our head or reading the Bible together. It can be a baptism or a communion cup or a sermon. These are religious. But there’s more to religion than just words.

Practicing “true religion” according to James is more about how we share our lives with others. And in the first chapter of Isaiah, it goes even deeper. Our singing and your praying, our fasting, and your special events – they may be religious, but they’re meaningless if we aren’t serving and helping others. If we don’t take it from our heart to our hands, it’s not “true religion.”

And here’s the thing – all those religious expressions from reading the Bible to saying prayers to singing songs – they’re all about God’s love for the whole world. How he pours his grace out to all of us. How he paid such a high price in sending his only Son to die for us! When we sing and pray, we are proclaiming that truth. But do we back it up? A lot of times we say one thing but act another.

The observable practice of “true religion” is that we share our lives with the needy, the hurting, and the vulnerable in our community and our world. We make it the rhythm of our life. We find the needs around us and do what we can to meet them.

Where do you find the need in your community? Maybe there’s a widow or an older couple on your block, around the corner. Maybe they don’t have kids, or don’t have any living nearby. Maybe they could get a lot out of you raking their leaves, bringing them a meal, or just spending time with them and talking.

Where do you find the need in your country? How many kids go without families in the United States? Right now, there are over 400,000 kids in the foster system and 100,000 of them are actively waiting to be adopted. Each year 30,000 age out of the system, entering the real world without a real family. Have you ever asked what you can do to help them?

Where do you find the need in our world? Right now, 780 million people around the world are undernourished and lack access to clean water. It seems like such a big burden, a huge need, an insurmountable obstacle. But little by little we can change the world.

When your heart beats with the needs of others, your pulse will lead you into a rhythm of sharing. It starts with your neighbors right next door, but it spreads around the world. At the intersection of a stirred heart and opportunity, you will find “true religion.”

What can you do today to help someone in need? Who has inspired you to put your religion into action?

What’s it mean to remember? Whenever tragedy happens, we often here the phrase “never forget.” We plaster that phrase on bumper stickers, banners, and across billboards. But what does it actually mean? How are we living out our lives in a way that remembers tragedy and responds to God’s hope for the world?

Honestly? Many times we allow the memories to fade. Or we transform and twist them into our own slant. We blame others. We resort to name calling. We take sides and pontificate. We huddle up and lash out. We take to social media and add our own two cents to the endless string of human nature that pours out

I know that’s true because that’s what I do. Many times. I leave behind the deep goodness that emerged in the hours and days right after a tragedy. I become numb. I stare at the mirror but then walk away without any change of heart or action.

We need to make responding in deep goodness a part of the natural rhythm of our lives. This week we took a deep dive into what it really means to “hear and do” what Jesus says. And James tells us it’s just like looking in a mirror.

²³ Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror ²⁴ and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. ²⁵ But whoever looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues in it—not forgetting what they have heard, but doing it—they will be blessed in what they do.

James 1:23-25

Have you ever looked in the mirror, found a hair out of place or a spot on your chin or a piece of broccoli stuck between your teeth and not done something about it? It’s only natural to check our reflection and make changes. We need that same rhythm when it comes to the word of God.

John 1 tells an incredibly poetic story of creation, transformation, and divine intervention. He speaks of Jesus Christ, the Word become flesh. But as we continue reading we see that we are to become something too. The Word in us becomes a tangible life of a grander vision of God. Every time we encounter the words and works of Jesus, it’s so that we can do better, be better.

The Word of God is always redemptive rather than repressive. It’s not a way to hammer us into submission, but to guide us towards salvation. Each time we live out the heartbeat of God in his Word, we get a little closer to making it part of our life rhythm. It’s not about being perfect, it’s about making it real.

As we continue living out the Word of God in our lives – being doers, not just hearers – as we repeat it over and over, it has real opportunity to be redemptive.

How are you living out the Word of God this week? How has it been redemptive in your past?

It’s easy to lose heart when we see such an incredibly tragic act of pure evil. In recent weeks we’ve seen devastation from multiple hurricanes, flooding, and earthquakes. But this type of action stings harder because it’s an act of one human against many others.

But Jesus told us about such things and encouraged us to not lose heart. In John 16:33 he told us we would have trouble. And we are also reminded in 2 Timothy 3:1-9 that there will be evil in the Last Days.

Here are a few thoughts to keep in mind as we move on from this tragedy.

• We should never be surprised or caught off guard by evil. It should make us angry, sad, even remorseful. But it should never surprise us. God told us clearly that evil is a reality in this world. When men and women act only for themselves, the results can be devastating.

• The presence of evil does not cancel out the goodness of God. Through the greatest act of love (Romans 5:8) Jesus bore our sins and evil and curse on the cross (Galatians 3:3). If anything, God’s goodness always counteracts the evil in the world (2 Timothy 3:9).

• It’s okay to doubt, but don’t lose heart. Jesus is always real about our struggles. Instead of condemning us for doubts, he encourages our hearts (John 16:33). It’s okay to question God, but make sure you’re asking the right questions.

• Instead of asking “Why?”, ask “What?” and “How?” I’ve seen little evidence in scripture that God answers the “why” question. But he always gives us the “what” and the “how” – What can I learn from this? What can I do because of this? How can I use this to point people to Christ? How do you want me to live differently?

• Overcome evil with good. Romans 12:21 says “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Jesus did just that on the cross with the greatest act of good ever. But we are called to do the same when tragedy strikes. Find someone to help. Give what you can. Hug those you love a little tighter. This is how good wins out over evil, when God’s people come together and work for each other.

A Prayer:

“Father, may you bind the hearts of those who love you. May you heal the hearts of those who have lost loved ones. And may you cure the hearts of those in this great country who have turned to evil, loving themselves more than others. Father, give us clear eyes to see you moving in the world, clear minds to find ways to act for good, and clear hearts to love beyond words. Amen.”

How do you like to be introduced? What do you like people to call you? On Sundays, I’m pastor Mike. But when I’m just hanging out around town, it’s just Mike. Unless I go to Starbucks, and they write my name down as “Mick” for some reason. To my kids, I’m Dad. Unless they want something, then I’m Daddy. They know how to pull on my heartstrings.

And that brings us to the book of James. There were lots of ways he could have introduced himself, a lot of titles he could carry around with him. He was Pastor James, or better yet Bishop James. He was known as James son of Joseph for most of his life. He would probably also answer to James from Nazareth. In fact, his name really isn’t James. That’s just our English way of saying the Greek translation of his Hebrew name, Jacob.

One title that he certainly had the right to was “Brother of Jesus.” You see, they shared the same mom, but not the same father. He grew up with Jesus, who has become the most famous figure in the entire world. But when he sat down to write this letter, a general message to all the Christians around the world, he calls himself something else – servant.

In the shortest words possible, he told us all we need to know about his faith, his purpose, and his motivation. What he was all about. It wasn’t who he knew, because he knew the biggest name in the closest way possible. It wasn’t how much he could gain from his life, but what he could offer. He chose the name servant because his rhythm of life led him that way.

We get to choose what defines us and what our purpose will be. Really, we do. There are lots of things in life that are out of our control. But when they come at us, we choose how we respond. And one of the ways we respond is by either taking or sharing.

How we choose what defines us will determine the rhythm of our life. What does your rhythm say? The rhythm of taking or the rhythm of sharing? It’s up to us. We can offer what little we have in the service of Jesus, or we can keep it all for ourselves thinking it’s so much more than it really is. But when we choose the rhythm of share, it becomes a regular lifestyle of giving ourselves away.

The next few weeks we’re going to really dig into what this means. We’re going to see how the rhythm of share is really about being hearers and doers of Jesus’ words. Anything else is like using sand as your foundation. We’re going to see that the rhythm of share gets interrupted when we only include some and exclude the rest. True sharing doesn’t pick favorites. And we’re going to see that the rhythm of share is the center of a faith that is alive and active, not distorted and dead.

But before we get to all of that, let’s just take a moment to think about how James responded to the question of, “Who are you?” He didn’t think being a family member of Jesus worthy to put on his name tag. Instead, he said, “I am completely at the disposal of Jesus. I’m fine with being a means to an end. I am satisfied in finding my purpose in serving someone else.” I hope we can mirror just a fraction of that attitude.