The Latin word behind the English word “discernment” means to separate. That’s what deciding is, really. To separate one choice from another. In a magic trick, you pick a card any card. That means you separate one out from the rest of the pack. Every time you make a decision in life – whether big or small – you are separating something from the rest.

When you decide to marry someone, you are separating them and yourself from the rest of the fish in the sea. When you decide on a pair of shoes in the morning, you are separating them from the other pairs in your closet. You are saying “yes” to one thing and “no” to everything else. Every time you choose a place to eat, you are saying “yes” to Culver’s and “no” to McDonald’s.

When it comes to the big things in life, the important things, God has called us to use discernment. That means we don’t just separate one choice from the rest on a whim. We need to separate before we ever actually choose. This last week, we tried to get to the heart of that idea. I’d like to share just a little bit more of what I was talking about.

Each day is made up of choices. They can be micro-choices, like which socks to put on today. They can be macro-choices, like whether or not to sign that mortgage. Most choices are the micro- variety. The macro-choices don’t come very often. And then there are the choices in between. “Should I have the salad or a burger?” can be a pretty important decision if you’re watching your cholesterol. Deciding who will pick up the kids after school can have a lot of consequences later. It’s in these in-between choices that most of our lives are directed. And God is just as interested in us making good decisions in those times as he is in the bigger, seemingly more important moments.

To make good decisions, we need discernment. That means we are able to first separate out some things and then decide wisely. For instance, when picking a school to go to you might sit down and make a “pros” and “cons” list. You separate out the good from the bad for each school. That way you are better equipped to choose.

But it’s not just separating out the things we like or want from those we don’t. There are other separations that must take place. For instance, we need to learn to separate God’s best from our good. We have the capacity to make any decision based on our limited knowledge and understanding. We can be confident that we’ll end up with our own good result. But what about God’s best? Taking a moment to separate those things out can lead us into greater choices.

Another way we make wise decisions is by separating our feelings from our thoughts. It’s not that your emotions are bad, it’s that we can often jump too quickly if we “follow our hearts.” Taking a moment to separate those things from each other allows us to better see why we are leaning one way over another.

We also need to separate ourselves. In other words, we need to say “yes” to God and “no” to ourselves. When we make self-centered decisions, we may be hurting someone close to us. But when we consider others – especially God – we can be wiser in those moments because we are more caring.

The basis for all of this has to be another type of separation, a separation of space. Practicing moments of time where we contemplate the things of God, our place in his world, his love for us, our role in sharing that love will sharpen us to make better decisions. And those moments don’t come naturally. So we need to separate ourselves. From the world, from our own perspectives, from the challenges around us, from the undertow of sin. When we separate and make space for those moments, we are putting ourselves in a place for abounding love, increased understanding, and trust in God’s grace.

This week, think through the “yes” and “no” you’re saying every time you make a choice. Create space to speak those things with love and life. And then follow through with confidence.